“Some things you must never stop refusing to bear”

The morning after Amendment 1: Your world. And mine.

A beautiful, carefully structured essay on the passage of Amendment One by Durham journalist Barry Yeoman.

Some food for thought here, in the form of status updates of Amendment One supporters. The ignorant ones are cheap. The civil ones are enlightening, if in a “is that really how you explain the world to yourselves?” kind of way. I find it akin to imagining how someone with color-blindness or synesthesia sees the world. I can’t do it.

And any mention of distinguishing the sinner from the sin reminds me of this reply by Washington Post columnist Gene Weingarten.

Atheist in the Deep South: Hi, Gene. I have a question, from one atheist to another: how do you deal with people who think homosexuality is a sin? I’m a gay rights activist and a queer, and I have seen the words “homosexuality is a sin” do immense damage to peoples’ lives, alienating them from their families, their communities, and their own senses of self-worth. Internalized homophobia is a terrible, destructive thing. Yet these “homosexuality is a sin” people insist that there’s nothing at all wrong with thinking that, especially because, as they say, “We’re all sinners.” When I point out that they think their sins are what they DO, but our sins are who we ARE, they just look at me blankly, most of the time. I’m asking because I have a couple of liberal Mormon friends who, in a conversation about the Mormon church’s atrocities against the LGBTQ crowd (they actually agree with me about this), just told me they think homosexuality is a sin, and we got in a big fight. In venting to other friends who don’t know the Mormons in question, several other people told me they feel the same way – love the sinner, hate the sin. This is making me feel sick to my stomach, and I don’t know what to do. This is the deep south, I don’t expect tons of enlightenment, but it’s a university town that overwhelmingly went for Obama, so I guess I thought it was a safer environment than I’m learning it is. So: What would Gene do?

Gene Weingarten: Gene would dislike these people intensely.

You happen to be treading on an area where I am uncommonly sure of myself and obnoxiously opinionated. (With food, I’m sort of kidding. Here, I’m not.)

Yeah, I’m an atheist, but I don’t disrespect religion; we’re all seekers of truth and understanding, and science and religion go about it in parallel ways. I’m most comfortable thinking about religion as a form of philosophy.

So far, so good. My problems with religion are when it is so reactionary that it institutionalizes bigotry. At that point, reason and faith no longer coexist, they are at war. At that point I feel it is the duty of the moral person to jettison the bigoted faith for another. Or for none.

“Love the sinner, hate the sin” is astonishingly patronizing, and duplicitous. It’s a cop-out. Love the slave as though he weren’t your property. Separate but equal.

I had a very close friend, a devout Christian, who told me that she worried about me because, as a nonbeliever in Jesus, I would be going to hell. What do you SAY to someone like that? I said nothing, but I never felt the same about her. She’s chosen an interpretation of her religion that consigns Mahatma Gandhi to hell. I’m supposed to RESPECT this?

Here’s the thing you need to remember: All those people who tell you that homosexuality is a sin, but they love you? They don’t. They think you are a lesser form of life.

Act accordingly.

Sorry. I got really angry about this yesterday.

Liz, can you link to the NYT story from yesterday about the anti-gay activists who had a hand in the Ugandan movement to EXECUTE gays? They’re trying to back away from it, but they can’t. They’re poison.

washingtonpost.com: Americans’ role seen in Uganda anti-gay push (NYT, 4 Jan. 2012)

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